I don't know if I have a seizure

I have had this seizure disorder for nearly 4 years now and the only times I can tell I am going to have a seizure for sure is when I smell something no one else does. Two weeks ago I was standing by kitchen sink and was peeling an apple with a sharp knife when I began to have a seizure, my boyfriend said it was a bad deal, the knife came so close to my throat. I do not remember anything before or after the seizure. I have to rely on my boyfriend to tell me if I have had any seizures or not. If i wake up in a strange position or on the floor I pretty much realize I had one, I have 4 different types of seizures that my boyfriend described to the specialist three years ago. The specialist said he described what an epileptic one looks like to the T, but would not tell him which one. I do not have enough they say to put me on any medications, I am somewhat very frustrated with the Doctors I have had lately, The biggest trigger for my seizures are headaches, yet they give me nothing for them. It has been hard for me too feel good about myself and be comfertable going anywhere lately. I have not had one in public as of yet and hope to keep it that way, 3 years ago was the last time I had one and that was at my nephews wedding rehersal. I have not been able to accept the fact that I have to rely on others instead of relying on only myself. I have not driven for 4 years now and miss the freedom my independance gave me. It is hard to talk to my boyfriend in regards to my feelings most of the time and My oldest sister is the only one who takes my feelings seriously right now. I hope not only to make new friends here but also find more support when I really need it the most. ......People change when the pain they are going through is worse then the unknown....... Joyce