I Want to Inspire Others With Epilepsy

I first started having night terrors at the age of 6 and was diagnosed with epilepsy at the age of 7. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, and I was very young. When I have my seizures, I am awake and aware which is terrifying and painful. My body tends to convulse with muscle tension and spasms that are beyond my control. At times, it feels like it is hard to breathe, even though I am awake. I would go to the hospital and have my brain waves looked at for a week, which then turned into me going home and doing it for a week. It was not fun.

I did not feel like a normal child growing up, which was difficult for me. I felt like taking medication wasn't normal for a kid in 4th grade, yes it was my reality. I had constant headaches or seizures where I would be out of school for a week or couldn’t take tests. I wasn’t viewed as a regular student, but I felt like I was a problem that couldn’t be fixed. I began advocating for myself and my education. By the time I got to high school, I was still having seizures, but I was putting myself first and advocating for myself daily. 

Epilepsy has taken a toll on not only my body but my mind too. After having a seizure my body is sore and tired. Since I am an athlete, feeling that way leads to also feeling helpless. My mental health starts with the medications that I have taken over the years. If I don't feel right about them, I have advocated for myself to find a different one. My smile, laughter, mental strength, and support system helped me to overcome the most challenging times.  

When everything in my life changed, I found my love and passion, which is soccer. Even with epilepsy, I have always played sports. I am currently 18, and 1 month seizure-free as a full-time college student playing collegiate DIII soccer. Even though I am seizure-free, I still face challenges. Living with chronic illness makes me reflect on life deeply and what it means for me when playing soccer. I focus on my education and feel that I am almost at the top of the mountain I have been climbing.

I saw the story of a young girl with epilepsy who was playing, and it inspired me to tell my story too. I want my journey to inspire other kids. Never stop smiling or laughing even through the hardest parts of this illness. Don’t give in to the negative ideas and emotions of epilepsy. Feel every emotion through the hard times and rely on your support system. If you love someone with epilepsy, be there for them and make sure they can count on you. Stay strong and advocate for yourself. In doing so, you are advocating for others as well.