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Non-participating Chat Members
Tue, 08/15/2006 - 23:16I really like chat. I do for several reasons. A major one is I get to know posters that I otherwise wouldn't. Other reasons is I can vent, get real time feedback. Others can also vent and if I'm able, I can help them and that feels good. Sometimes it's just plain fun. One of the people I really enjoyed on chat was there most nights then disappeared. I wondered why, asked and was told because many people are signed up but many of them lurked or at least never participated. That very good participant is now lost - because of the lurkers. Frankly, I'm having a problem with that too.
Tonight at one point there were 13 people signed in on chat. 4, then 3, then 2 of us were participating. Two of us said "hello" to one person and we never got a response. I finally asked, where are these people, lurking? And also said I found that rude and uncomfortable. I DO understand sitting back and reading, but not even responding? Then someone they were participating in "private chat". Well good grief get on IM then. Normally I'm not a paranoid person but some very deep topics can occur in chat and to have someone lurking or have their name there and giving no feedback is NOT a good env. for anyone to pour their hearts out. I've had several newbies over the months ask me why there are names listed, specifically one name in chat but they never participate. I didn't know at that time why, am taking the person who informed me tonight they were in private chat that must be the reason. But for a newbie who is already insecure? Come on let's please not increase their insecurity.
I'd like to request if you go to chat to participate. No one has to gab and gab but at least make your presence known occasionally. If you want a private chat? Go to IM. There is one person I see frequently and only when I forced this person to say something I got a one word answer. Is this what chat is about? It shouldn't be. Please if you want a private chat, fine. But go to IM.
Gretchen
Comments
Dear Ellie, I certainly hope
Submitted by rootbeergirl16 on Mon, 2006-08-21 - 12:48
Dear Ellie,
I certainly hope that your encounter with one very RUDE person will not keep you away from the Chat room. The Chat room can be anything you want it to be and let me tell you that all kinds of things are discussed in there. There are questions and answere there are light hearted moments with lots of laughter and there is a whole bunch of support and there is alot of standing on the sides learning. For some one to tell you to Shut up is very very rude. I know that I have been here allmost a year and I can tell you that I have made some really good friends and I have also seen alot of soap opera like behavior (arnt we all a little divaish once in awhile (heehee) But for the most part it is allways a supportive experiance. I think that if you hang out awhile you will like it. Sending much love and good thoughts your way.
Pam
Re: Dear Ellie, I certainly hope
Submitted by Cathy_C on Mon, 2006-08-21 - 17:13
Hey Pam,
How are you doing? I think you were in there the other night when
a new gal had come in and mentioned she was new to this site. I got talking to her and she mentioned she had a 3month old that she thought was having seizures, and told of the things the baby was doing. I had suggested that she either call 911 or take the baby to the hospital. Within minutes of us talking she told us she was leaving and was going to go. I believe she was on her way to the hospital. See good things can happen in the chat room. I feel God puts people in there that he wants in there at what time he wants us
in there to help others. I just hope that my advice may have helped her and may have at the end saved her little baby from dying from a seizure.
I may not have said one word before that because I thought it wasn't anything that I was interested in and then got talking to Joanne and making her feel comfortable being there.
Have you seen her around again Pam?? I hope she will come back into the chat and update us on the baby. Maybe I will see you in there later this evening. I am here all alone, hubby had to leave for
a meeting earlier. Have a great evening.
Cathy
Re: Re: Re: Re: Non-participating Chat Members
Submitted by coolcanadian on Mon, 2006-08-21 - 22:40
Hi all, I've been away for a long while myself. I have been dropping into Chat without chiming in. Two major reasons are that 1) I haven't anything to say and 2) I'm trying to get familiar with folks who have joined while I've been away. A note to Mari- there was a real creep here late last year, and I stayed away for many weeks. I even changed my login name. But I found there is a deep personal bond I feel here that I don't find with any other group. Nobody understands E better than we do. There's a great deal of support given and received here that can't be found anywhere else. If you want a new Buddy, I'll volunteer. Peace, marko