I just want to give up

CDC funded page

Not a CDC funded Page

To anyone who will listen: Over the past few weeks, my wife described to me â€œepisodesâ€, which she claims I was having. I of course, have no reason to doubt her, but donâ€™t remember them. The first ones were describe as me just standing at the kitchen counter, staring off in the distance with a blank look and not responding to her questions. She stated that these â€œepisodesâ€ would only last for a minute or two. About two weeks ago, she told me that after I went to bed she heard a loud noise, came upstairs and found me sitting on the floor. I responded to her questions, had the same blank stare and she led me into bed. The next morning I had no memory of the incident. I must add that during all these events there was no twitching or strange movements of the eyes or other body parts. Just yesterday, I went to see a neurologist for an exam. After completing same, he scheduled me for a CAT scan and started me on Keppra. You know, just in case. Being 51 years of age and never having had anything like this happen before, I am shocked to think that I may have Epilepsy. While my state does not require the Doctor to report his findings, he has stated that he does not want me to drive. Needless to say, that was the straw that broke the camelâ€™s back. I donâ€™t know if I can handle the lost of independence, as well as the emasculating feeling of not being able to drive brings. Any advice before I do what Iâ€™ve been contemplating since this arose?

Comments

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: I just want to give up

Submitted by jamie crowell on Wed, 2007-01-24 - 21:52

Amos i know exactly how you are feeling i have had epilepsy my whole life but only your dr. can tell you if you have it or not. I am 44 and cannot drive. I live with my parents and must get rides from them to go to work. Luckily I only work about a mile from my job. If your dr. says you can't drive then don't.you would be putting yourself in danger and others who are on the road as well. I have grandmal seizures and partial complex seizures which make me incontinent sometimes. I have to keep a change of clothes at work. when i have these seizures sometimes it can be embarrassing but i deal with it.i bet you that you would get great support from your family and friends. I have been on18 different meds in my life and also had an implant yet i still have seizures. i never give up hope because even though my epilepsy is bad there are many others out there who have it worse off than i do. Just the other night i talked with a mother who as a son with progressive epilepsy which is so bad that he sometimes cannot walk and must use a weelchair. BE THANKFUL FOR WHAT YOU HAVE AND THEN MAKE THE MOST WITH IT! MOST OF ALL DON"T GET DEPPRESSED ABOUT IT. IF YOU FIND YOURSELF GETTING DEPPRESSED ABOUT IT THAT MAY BE A SIDE EFFECT FROM YOUR MEDS> I KNOW THIS BECAUSE I AM ON KEPPRA ALSO AS WELL AS LAMICTAL AND FELBATOL. best of luck- Jamie Crowell

the loss of independance,

Submitted by beachcomber on Sun, 2007-02-11 - 16:36

the loss of independance, yes i still remember when i had that thing that people like to call independance but itsnot everything, you have a wife and a life. you may think it is the end of the world, i still do sometimes if im honest, but it gets gradually easier. please dont do anything crazy. its not worth it, if it is epilepsy then you have to deal with it, sorry to be so blunt but its true there is no other way, u can denie it but then you have a sz on a public bus or in a shop and theres not much you can do to denie that??!!!!!!! you have to live with it and learn how to cope. im not saying its easy because its not. but you do learn and it does get easier. independance will come back as the sz come under control. please dont do anything crazy beach x x x

Re: the loss of independance,

Submitted by aunsbaby on Sun, 2007-02-11 - 17:55

i am 52 yrs old and just found out that i have epilepsy and have had it all my life without convulsive episodes. i have had partial complex seizures most of my life and did not know that what i was experiencing was epileptic seizures. i have worked on a job that i began to hate in the past two years for 28 years. i hated it because although i knew how to totally run the operation i was always given a lame excuse or sometimes no excuse at all as to why i was not considered or chosen for promotion to operations manager if i applied. one night i left work after a particularly stressful day, i had a grand mal seizure while driving home at the speed of 65mph on an interstate because i lived 44 miles one way from my job. i am extremely happy to let you know that God was with me at that time because He gave me the wherewithal to more to the right(slowest)lane. fortunately there was a lot of traffic that had gone ahead of me and about a mile behind me there was a lot of traffic coming towards me. i blacked out and i believe that during the black out i stopped accelerating and drifted to the right and my brand new 2006 ford mustang convertible came to a stop as it hit the retaining wall on a bridge over a sanitary canal. about a half hour later i came to with flashing lights and police and paramedics banging on my window asking was i ok. i was transported to an hospital where doctors worked with me to try and find out what had happened to me. after four days of hospitalization and a headache that lasted 4 days i was released with no real knowledge of what had happened to me or what occurred in the half hour after when i was blacked out. before leaving the hospital i was told that i could not drive unitl firther notice. what a slap in the face!!!! i have never had an accident in all the 31 years of driving and my stress reliever was to get in the car and drive until i calmed down. the blessing is that i did not die in that accident, i am now on short term disability from my job and due to hard work and precise diagnosis of a great neurologist who has me on keppra, i feel better than i have felt for the majority of my life and it is a pleasure to sit in the passenger seat for a change. my car only received minor damage and once i am stabilized with my treatments, i wiil get to drive it again but only short distances. hang in there because there is a good reason your driving priviledges have been restricted. sometimes we need someone or something to get us to pull over and assess our place life so that we can regroup and get on the right track