Community Forum Archive
The Epilepsy Community Forums are closed, and the information is archived. The content in this section may not be current or apply to all situations. In addition, forum questions and responses include information and content that has been generated by epilepsy community members. This content is not moderated. The information on these pages should not be substituted for medical advice from a healthcare provider. Experiences with epilepsy can vary greatly on an individual basis. Please contact your doctor or medical team if you have any questions about your situation. For more information, learn about epilepsy or visit our resources section.
Stress and seizures and marriage issues
Thu, 03/01/2007 - 19:55I am 28 years old and I have been married for about 2 months. My husband does not know much about epilepsy. My seizures are mostly triggered by lack of sleep and stress. He just believes I say that as an excuse. He does not know much about epilepsy and does not think it is serious. I am sleepy through most of my day and if I do not get a nap I begin having aura's. We have alot of marriage problems and money stress. How do I help him understand any of this? I also have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia. None of these he understands either he just thinks I am tired and lazy. I also have an autistic son which is a source of huge stress for me, but he leaves alot of the responsibilty of him to me no matter how I am feeling.
Please help me.
Tera
Comments
Re: Re: Re: Re: Stress and seizures and marriage issues
Submitted by Hoddinott on Fri, 2007-03-02 - 19:44
Well I'm in Canada so things are so much different here. About 40% of Canadians don't have a family doctor. I'm lucky and I do. So it sucks when you see a different doctor each time you have a issue. But anyways, when I do seizure from what others say I look like a fish out of water, I usually urinate as well. But my last seizure I just passed out and my son called 911 this time when they came I was alert, usually I'm not alert until arriving at the hosp. But I felt fine and just wanted to stay home. So the ambulance gave me oxygen for about ten mins then left. This is what made my nero. surgeon so mad. But I told him every time I have a seizure and go to the hosp. I sit there for over six hours for nothing, and I didn't want to go I felt fine. Then he lectured me on how if you go into a second one how dangerous it could be. Usually I have no choice but to go to the hosp. cause people around me panic and call 911 and i'm not alert till after Im already at the hosp. I use to live in Pennsylvania and things are so different there so much better. Medical care is not so great here, people don't pay here for medical so they take HUGE advantage of it. The emergency rooms are always full, example my four year old daughter fell off the bunk bed at the baby sitters we took her to the emergency room and waited almost three hours before being taken in then another two for xrays ect. She broke her collar bone we were there for six hours in Pennsylvania it would of been a hour.
Re: Stress and seizures and marriage issues
Submitted by Sugerfree on Sat, 2007-03-03 - 00:07
Hi Tera-
I live in So California also. There is an Epilepsy Foundation support group that meets on Saturdays near LAX if you are close to there. It has members with Epilepsy and Family members that meet together to discuss caregiving and the fears of Epilepsy. If you need more info
let me know and I will reply to you.
Joan
Re: Re: Re: Stress and seizures and marriage issues
Submitted by heathersmithers on Fri, 2007-03-02 - 18:33
Hi Tera Im a little older than you....(just a tiny bit...grin.. 41) and on my second marriage.. we have been married for 6 years now,,, 4 months after we were married we were hit with the dx of epliepsly for me.. i also had three boys two of which are ADHD ,,, and for the first couple of years i felt alone and like it was my personal battle as it seemed like my husband just kept his head buried in the sand... family members just wanted to pretend it did not exist...sigh.. then almost 2 years ago it got really interesting....grin... i had a small stroke... couldn't ignore that one would think,,,,wrong...dont get me wrong here,,, my husband was extremely helpful,,, just refused to acknowldge it existed.... fast forward to about 8 months ago to a new neuro the ms neuro... now i was told i have ms... and i have not been able to get him to discuss that at all either... Now i must admitt that is alot of stress to put on a person in a relatively new marriage... grin... that really is taking the for better or worse ..in sickness and health ..bit a bit to far... but hey... you did sign on the dotted line right? Dragging him to the dr.s appt. is absoutly the right idea.. 100% my husband did not want me taking the ativian script my epilepsy neuro was giving me and actually said so until the neuro told him what status seiure was,, and then asked my husband if he had taken time to educatue himself ...grin... not that he actually has taken the time but he did start to pay attention a bit... Now on our spouses defence... i actually think the more they read the more they scare themselves.... which is a shame because then they tend to listen to lets say...buba at work who has a cousin who has a friend who has a aunt...etc.. you get the idea... and then they all of the sudden some home and say if you drink green tea you will be fine...grin... They are just scared and dont know how to handle it,,, i am sure your husband loves you.. but all of the sudden he is in a situation that he cannot fix.. ,,, As a husband, wife, mother, father, etc... to watch someone you love suffer in any way and not be able to fix the problem or "cure" them leaves you feeling inadaquete. Perhaps try leaving phamplets around the house,,, see if he picks them up and reads them... someone told me once the bathroom was a great place...grin.. Good luck and dont lose hope it just takes time for him to adjust. Heather