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just need to talk
Wed, 03/30/2005 - 02:03Topic: Family & Friends
So I was feeling fine and then on Easter Sunday, I have a seizure. It's been almost 6 mths since my last one and I just thought this was just typical of me. I have a tendencey to have seizures on holidays. I feel so isolated afterward because everyone in my family knows and they treat me like I'm a little kid. It bothers me to no end. I felt so depressed afterward and no one in my family knows what I'm going through. Sure they can make comparisons but that's just pitying me, not be able to know or feel what I just went through. My ex-boyfriend wants to know what's wrong and but I don't think that I can tell him this because he will just feel bad for me and not be able to know what I am seriously going through.
Comments
RE: RE: just need to talk
Submitted by frogman137 on Wed, 2005-03-30 - 02:03
Young lady I understand exactly how you feel.I wish I'd have caught you online so we might have talked a bit about it but I'm usually on late.I'm 35 and didn't even find out I had the problem until I was 24.Eventhough I am 35 my parents still treat me like I'm a kid due to this problem.I've found that nothing I've ever done has changed it.My family looks out for me because they care.I'd be willing to bet the same is true in your case.No matter how agrivating it may gets just keep that in mind.I've also found that asking them to back off a bit works for me once in a while.Simply asking for your space in this situation may work as in other situations.As for your boyfriend,he's probably as scared as the rest of them.I hate the being babied thing and the whole "I know you didn't take your medicine," thing but it's all part of our loved ones trying to deal with something they'll never understand.In a case like this they're as helpless as we are while we're seizing.This beast in our heads makes both us and those around us helpless and vulnerable and babying us,no matter how wrong it is or how much we hate it is just their way of dealing with something they can't put their hands on.A way of dealing with their own vulnerability in this situation.
RE: just need to talk
Submitted by spiz on Wed, 2005-03-30 - 00:33
Rhosgirl,
I understand.For some reason, holidays are the worst for me too and I can count on seizure activity everytime. It's on those days that I really feel the epilepsy could at least take a day off. And it's the same here- the comparisons, being babied (not a good idea!), and it's knowing they don't understand that makes it hard for me. I keep the 'face' on as long as the crowd is there, but it comes off when everyone goes home and my husband has to deal with my anger and depression. And it's hard for him but how can I explain something to him that he can't even picture and that I don't understand myself? I wait for the inevidible question..."Are you sure you took your medicine?"..."Then why isn't it working?" It's at this time that I honestly want to throw something at him but I know about the time I pick it up I'll drop it on my own foot. I know he doesn't know what to say and I know that whatever he were to come out with would strike me wrong. And I know he feels helpless because he's aware he can't understand this thing that makes me feel so isolated and alone. And I love him for it. But....
-Spiz
Rhosgirl,
I understand.For some reason, holidays are the worst for me too and I can count on seizure activity everytime. It's on those days that I really feel the epilepsy could at least take a day off. And it's the same here- the comparisons, being babied (not a good idea!), and it's knowing they don't understand that makes it hard for me. I keep the 'face' on as long as the crowd is there, but it comes off when everyone goes home and my husband has to deal with my anger and depression. And it's hard for him but how can I explain something to him that he can't even picture and that I don't understand myself? I wait for the inevidible question..."Are you sure you took your medicine?"..."Then why isn't it working?" It's at this time that I honestly want to throw something at him but I know about the time I pick it up I'll drop it on my own foot. I know he doesn't know what to say and I know that whatever he were to come out with would strike me wrong. And I know he feels helpless because he's aware he can't understand this thing that makes me feel so isolated and alone. And I love him for it. But....
-Spiz