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Just really sad about everything


Does anyone ever get really really depressed about it? L8ly ive been getting sad all the time worrying about my future. I think about to many "what ifs" like what if i cant have a kid because my medication will hurt it. Or what if my medication stops working and i switch medications but it really changes me completely. Cuz i have been on several medications and every 1 has there own weird side effects some of which change my personality, what if i am married with kids when that happens and it effects the relationship between me and my husband? What if i have a seizure while im driving and wreck and hurt soembody or worse kill somebody. What if something happens to me were they need to get me on some kind of medication right away but htey cant cuz of the one im already on could interact badly? Theres just so many more. Im considering brain surgury just so then i could get all of these out of my head. Does anyone else ever feel like this?


You're not alone. I feel this way all the time and its starting to bug everyone around me.

I admit I had the suicidal thoughts and the deep depression but I got some help and am doing much better."What ifs"only dig you more down into depression, a shovel in a sense.Instead of worrying about the future have fun now! Be with friends,go to school or church.The more active you are the better you will feel.

"The past can't be rewritten. The future has yet to be seen but today is a gift, which it is why its called the present. '

Don't feel alone,when bad things happen,its seems that the first thing we do is second guess ourselves.

I'm sure your not the one who feels the way do because i feel the same way about some of yours. Its hard not to let things get the best of you,mine still get to once in a while and i been living with E now for almost 6 years.The best things to do is stay close to the people who have always been good to you,find sombody that your comforable talking to,including this site,keep your head up,say to yourself,"It may take some time,but i will do everthing i can do to achive everything i want to do",and most importantly,KEEP A SMILE ON YOUR FACE AND BE PROUD OF YOURSELF.The only thing that holds you back is yourself.

Take care of yourself,  Steve

chelsea, i may have the mildest known form of epilepsy, but i truly understand what you mean.

these are things that you cant change in your life....who knows, if you are a teen like me, you have the best chance of growing out of it, and i know someone who has.

you just cant sit there and think negative. there are negatives and positives, negatives hold us back, positives push us forward. ignore the fact that you have epilepsy. take care of it, but just ignore it. just make it another chore and move on. epilepsy is one of those super rare disorders that dont affect our ability to work, hang out with friends, have fun, and be successfull in life. i dont see what there is to be so depressed about.

so what if you cant have a baby? adopt one.

so what if you feel uncomfortable driving? learn your triggers and avoid them while driving.

so what if people think you are weird? they are jerks that have been hidden from life's reality by mommy. they probably couldnt handle stress or sickness as nearly as well as you.

chelsea, a little while after i was diagnosed with juvenile myoclonic epilepsy, i had no desire to carry on in life. if i had a gun, then this account wouldnt exist. thankfully, i decided to ignore my disorder altogether, and i am living my life the way i want. 

if you have any questions, for gods sake ask me, i think i just taught myself a few lessons in this post. you can also email me at


I was just talking with my husband about how sad I feel, and I'm still on the verge of tears as I write this, but I wanted to tell you what my husband just said to me. He said, "Michelle, we are lucky that we live in these modern-times where we have great doctors who deal with this sort of thing. Think about what it must have been like a hundred years ago." That is so true. Hey, If the meds don't work, or if the side effects are so bad that your quality of life is seriously compromised, then I would suggsest, from what I have read, to look into seeing if you are a candidate for surgery. From what I have read surgery can be an avenue, and for some, the only avenue to get your life back.

Best, Michelle


 Im a 26 year old mom who was diagnosed with epilepsy when I was 16. Depression is a common thing for most people who have epilepsy. I have those days where I feel like im just so tired of all these different medications and why did this happen to me. I went to a specialist in Rochester, NY and tried to see if I would be a canidate for the surgery, but unfortunatley my seizures arent in a focalized point. So basically its just hit and miss now with meds. As for having a baby I myself was worried about that I chose to have a C-section instead of natural birth, and I couldnt breastfeed because of the meds i was on but i have a beautiful amazing 6yr old son now. As for driving that always makes me sad I havent driven since i was 16, but its something you learn to accept. Also, for worrying about how your gonna treat your husband or friends and family, if they love you they will understand and always be there for you. I used to get embarassed when Id have a seizure, but my family has always been there to help me out to take care of me after. Trust me, when your with the ones you love, things dont have to seem so hopeless. Take care of yourself Chelsea, and I wish you the best of luck!

  Hello, I am Shenoah. (16)

      Having E can make you worry a lot, but don't. Life is full of ups and downs, regardless of the fact that you have E. Things can change, and will. You shouldn't worry about "what if" becasue if you spend your time with "what if" you will never "do". My brother (Joe, 19) has had E for a year and a half, and he gets depressed and worried too, one thing you SHOULDN'T do though, is spend all your time thinking about it. It could actually cause you to have a SZ! There are a lot of things you can do with E.    If you settle down and start a family, then your man will just have to love you and understand you enough to know, that it is the medication, not you, and it is what needs to be done to protect you. If he loves you, EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY.

    Don't get sad at looking into your future, look at E as an oppurtunity to share your story, life, and tribulations with others, therefor helping them. You can do a lot for people just like you and my brother.


Shenoah Brooke

i used to not feel anything wrong with me. seizures were a part of my life. end of story.

but now that i'm in college, everything has changed. YOUR NOT ALONE. i felt alone for a while thinking what have i to live for? tried to kill myself as well. dont do that. but lately, i've just been really sad and wish i was someone else. 

but consider this: you are lucky. you can have an understanding of life that no one else really can. epileptics can have kids. medications come and go, most do have side effects but you just have to find the one that is good for you. everyone's different. with enough luck, you will find the one to make your seizures under control. 

lastly, dont try and fight this alone. come here regularly. find someone like you or someone you find really interesting and talk to them on a daily basis. i found myself a few pen pals to email every day. it really helps to have a person also waiting for an email from you. constant peer support. cuz face it, the people around you in every day life who dont have epilepsy, can say they know what your going thru, but most times they dont. 

 hope this helped a little! feel free to email me any time k, hun? 


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