Best choice ever! The Debsquared Story

When I was an infant my parents found me in my crib having some type of seizure. It was not diagnosed as epilepsy. At the age of 16, I was in a major car accident. There was a lot of damage to my face, as well as my head. My teenage years were particularly hard as, unfortunately, no one was interested in a girl who had a lot of bad facial injuries. I needed three plastic surgeries to improve my face, and therefore my self-esteem. It soon became apparent that the injury was not only to my face, but also somewhere else. A few months later I was in a school tournament, on the volleyball court, about to serve, when I had a "black out". After many visits to different doctors I was finally diagnosed with Epilepsy! In high school, as the seizures became more frequent, my friends began to disappear. I don’t know if this was my fault because I was so concerned with my health or theirs because they just couldn't handle my illness and me. I actually have no memory of that time. My parents were very scared and would do anything to make their "baby" feel better. At the same time that the seizures began to increase, I realized that I wanted to go to college. I did not want to give up the idea of studying, but unfortunately, as the seizures were becoming more frequent; my dream of becoming a teacher was looking to be more of a fantasy than a reality. I was losing my ability to remember anything I have read. I refused to give up school. I began studying at Kutztown University, then Southern Connecticut State University, but had to transfer to Bergen Community College, near my hometown, so that I could be close to my parents. I changed my major to restaurant/business management, feeling that I would be more comfortable hidden in the kitchen! While at school, I had an interview for Disney University, FL, to become a cast member. It was like a dream come true. Although I didn't want to leave home, my boyfriend – who is now my husband, supported me all the way. The seizures were still happening but I didn't give up. As I finished school, I received my Ducktorate Degree from Disney, as well as an Associates of Arts Degree from Bergen. I realized that the medication just wasn't helping; it was worsening my depression and feelings of aggravation, this was not making my life any easier. I averaged over 220 seizures in the year before I turned 21. Throughout this time I was working as a substitute teacher in a private Jewish day school, knowing I had enough credits. I wanted to do what I loved. That was helping young children, and making a difference in their lives. I was also working as a waitress, loving the restaurant business but afraid of becoming the chef I dreamed of as well. It was a source of helping to make some extra income, on the side. When I decided to have surgery, everyone questioned this decision. My answer was that I wanted to really begin my life, to drive, to start my own family, and to receive more education. This was very difficult being that I couldn't remember anything I was reading. My family and I decided that I should go for surgery at Yale University Hospital in Conn. It consisted of two different surgeries. The first was an "On the Brain" EEG to see exactly where the dead brain tissue was. This procedure also confirmed that it could be safely removed. The second was the actual removal of the cell itself. It was the best decision I have ever made. I haven't had a seizure since. I am still considered to be an epileptic; I just don’t feel like one anymore! In the past years I have managed a children's clothing store, as well as my parent’s collectible store. I have taken early childhood education courses for my CDA (Child Development Association) certification and I have worked as a preschool teacher for years, beginning as a pre-k assistant and finally teaching a two year old program, which I started for years. I finally decided to go back to college, to receive my Bachelor’s Degree Social Science focusing on Mental illness and Cultural Studies with a minor in Psychology and Judaic Studies. I was a student at Ramapo College, striving to prove I can do anything I try to. Although I am unable to read like the average student I have enjoyed learning through the help of the Kurzweil system, a program that reads the text to me, and the understanding of the professionals, I hope to one day thank! I did it - by Debbie Schwartz on Friday, May 13, 2011 at 12:02am As I sit here today thinking about the road to becoming a college graduate, I realize, I hit many bumps along the way. But, I always had a desire in my heart to go forward. As I think about the routes I have taken, I realized that I had Jack and my boys, as well as all my special friends (now my family) who understood my situation. I have learned that what that was if it was important or meaningful to me, the memory that stayed in my heart. Unfortunately, people didn't realize that was a side effect to my surgery. If I fought with my family it was because I could only remember things that I felt a deep emotional feeling for. I survived the surgery and really want others to know they can do it too! Please never give up... there is a light at the end of the tunnel! For years I wondered why I couldn't remember anyone's name. The memory was so difficult to deal with, but for the first time I think I understand why. It was the statement the doctor asked me in the hospital before my brain surgery He asked... "Why are you having this surgery?" I replied "because I want to get married, go back to school, drive and have children." He responded..." OK, you'll get married and drive, but don't count on any children or going back to school….It will be too hard and you won't be able to carry a child!" I didn't respond... That statement stayed in my heart forever. It was so strong I never could forget it! It covered every other part of my heart that was important. Instead I proved him wrong! I got married, got pregnant not only with my own but a special child I will always have in my heart, started to drive and now I am Graduating! I have learned a lot! The most important lesson is that if things are in your heart, it is also in your memory. Reach the most important things in life full heartedly and you will go far! Thank you G-d, my family and friends for believing in me! (Daddy, especially you)! I hope you are proud!) I am married to a very special man in my life. Jack has been there for me throughout my toughest fight with this illness and he is a great supporter of this foundation. At times my memories of those days are missing, but he always tries to bring them back! I was blessed with two very special miracle children of my own, which I was told would never happen. But, thankfully I was placed on folic acid to help strengthen the ability to carry them. I was also a surrogate for a special person in my life because I was led to believe I couldn't expect any children of my own. So if I can bring this special gift to another person, I would. I just wish he understands this foundation one day! Unfortunately, my youngest son has just been diagnosed with epilepsy. My first reaction was anger towards God. I now know that the most valuable thing that I can do is to show people that epilepsy can be controlled. Sometimes, you just have to take chances. The fact that my child has epilepsy has inspired me to make sure that other people are informed about epilepsy. Educators are the people who inspire me the most. I am preschool and Hebrew teacher, and enjoy every moment. It is so important to understand that each moment spent with a child is meaningful. We must make sure that every child’s needs are addressed, whatever these needs may be. It is so important to me to be able to teach. Everyone has inspired me in different ways. They are truly heroes in many ways. I just hope they know how important they are in the everyday life of a child. For me there was a cure. It took a long time and was a very challenging process. I believe that everything in life happens for a reason and so want to urge people never to give up. We must support and be open to all the various methods of testing. Please feel free to donate anything possible. I am the proof. I was once a "guinea pig" and I am now a true survivor! As I sit here today thinking about the road I took in order to become a college graduate, I realize, I hit many bumps along the way. But, I always had a desire in my heart to go foward. As I think about the routes I have taken, I realized that I had Jack and my boys, as well as all my special friends (now my family) who understood my situation. I have learned that what was that if it was important or meaningful to me, the memory that stayed in my heart. The one thing I learned was that is possible... there has been proof that your heart holds memory. Unfortunatly people didn't realize that loss of memory was a side effect to my surgery. If I fought with my family it was because I could only remember things that I felt a deep emotional feeling for. For instant the reason I wrote my original page... It was not bragging rights... It was a way of letting go to something that meant so much, without harming the family involved. I survived the surgery and really want others to know they can do it too! Please never give up... there is a light at the end of the tunnel! Now that my experience with seizures has come to an end, I am deciding to combine both my talents/education and use my cooking to help others in my fields of expertise.(If anyone know how I can do it, I would love to hear from them to make my dream come true.). Hopefully mentoring epileptics or others to know their dreams can come true, too. Just as mine will!