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Parent needs help with Son
Thu, 09/14/2006 - 09:59Topic: Parents & Caregivers
I have problem with my son I’m unable to get help for himself. He is 33 years old. He not able to hold a job the reason he thinks he is always right. I have tried to get help with his anger he won’t talk to anyone.
Dose anyone know I might be able to talk to about this matter
Scott
jgregorius@knology.net
Re: Parent needs help with Son
Submitted by GodivaGirl on Thu, 2006-09-14 - 11:41
As a woman who is 32 (granted employed) but still, as a woman who is 32, some times dad & mom need to know the boundaries on a kid's life. I know my dad & mom haven't always agreed with my choices over the years, but they go with it. Once your an adult, you've got to live life and learn from your mistakes on your own. Perhaps get your son some outside counselling. A psychologist might not hurt. Follow that up by a career counsellor to point him in the dirrection of the right job. Yes, at age 32 I know my parents love and care about me. However, they understand (and have since I was about 25 - when I moved out) there's got to be space. I'll ask for their input when I want it, I know they're always there for me, but really unless I ask for the most part - back off. They used to constantly bug me about finances, work and my life in general. I'm common-law - been with the same guy for 5 years. At first they weren't thrilled with how quickly our long distance relationship moved, now they consider him family. It's all about letting go. You've gotta let your son think he's right, learn from his mistakes, not be overly judgemental and just help him along the way, as he asks. Sometimes the more you make your kids feel wrong, the more they're going to do the opposite of what you really want (and what is best). I went through that phase bigtime 1st & 2nd year university. Was a real party person - drinking, experimenting, etc. - smartened up and graduated in sociology/criminal justice now I work in IT Inside Sales. My boyfriend is 30, just had a tough life (no seizures at all or anything) battles depression and other issues, is just finishing up grade 12. However, he's got a real creative side to him & writes amazing stuff that gets published from time to time. Writing is his true desired job! Everyone has something they would love to do. Help your son find out what that is, and help him get there, don't put him down for it. Anger Management + Career Counselling, then back off and let him learn from his mistakes - that's what I'd suggest. Hope this helps. Erin