Chat and Community Forums Closed

Due to the popularity of social media, we have seen decreasing engagement on our forums and chat. Please know we want to keep talking to you about epilepsy, seizures, and what you need. We want to stay connected with you.

Community Forum

Child now 18, now what?


Hello everyone.

As some of you may know, my son graduated GS and is now in college. He decided not to take his medication anymore, and stay up all night, and after 2 months he got a TC, it was just a matter of time at that pace. Now his grades are in the tubes, can't get up to go to class while recuperating, teachers are freaked out, friends fled, license taken etc.etc. He us fine now, and enrolled in the disability services office, but the semester is by all purposes done and grades took a hit, some he will pass while others he will fail and we are way last the dropping point. Ambulance bills have started to come and I am too tired and overwhelmed with it. I know he is sleeping somewhat "better" and now that he feels fine is back to doing his work, and now finally "gets it", but it seems to me that I am left with the anguish and suffering at home, dealing with all this mess. He had remission for 4 years! He was doing well. But bottom line he pushes his limits because he is away from home and independent now, and I can't do anything about it, which brings me to my original point of feeling left with having to worry and deal with the after math.

Can't talk to the doctor. Can't talk to the college. Can't make him take his meds. So what now? We have a wonderful relationship, so it is not a case of rebellion or anything like that, is him being like ALL other kids but having to suffer the consequences if it, which makes me feel guilty as I feel responsible. I cried myself to sleep for a week, then we went to see him and he is all fine and unworried and back to normal, but it is ME the one not back to normal.

Anyway, any tips, ideas, or commiseration would be helpful. Letting go has not been easy as I feel responsible to keep on helping him. I know he has to figure this out on his own, but at what price? Imagine my situation trying to CALM his fellow classmates on the phone, trying to plead with the campus police and paramedics, trying to get him to get a ride back to the school, dealing with the doctors, teachers, insurance, paperwork... it is a nightmare.

Last, I wanted to say that yes I am whinning and that I know how lucky we really are, so please forgive me.

Our Mission

The mission of the Epilepsy Foundation is to lead the fight to overcome the challenges of living with epilepsy and to accelerate therapies to stop seizures, find cures, and save lives.

24/7 helpline