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I'm terrified to do anything

Hi everyone! I've never done a forum before, so thank you for checking this out. I'm excited to join this community (I guess??). I have epilepsy and am TERRIFIED to do anything. I wake up each morning working if I will have a seizure, then I remember stress can influence a seizure, then I get stressed about being stressed. Since I am in college, if I fall to get a good night's sleep I go to bed scared to wake up in the morning. I am afraid something will happen at my internship, or on the street, or anywhere, and that I will be all alone. I try not to think about it. Up until this point I haven't been worried about my condition, it's just now that I've passed the 1yr mark since my last seizure (yay!) I've been becoming more afraid. Although I can kind of tell when one is going to happen (I feel out of body-ish and not mentally present, and it has always happened in the morning after not so good sleep). I'm not sure where I am going with this, it's just nice to talk it out and not have someone look at you like a puppy with no legs or something. What have you done if you've experienced feelings like this? Thank you.

Comments

Hey there, I definitely know

Submitted by Believer_59cd4d81a99cf on Sun, 2019-03-17 - 00:35
Hey there, I definitely know what you're talking about. I'm in grad school and work 2 jobs, and even though I've had seizure control for a while, like you said you have, the anxiety didn't just go away. I still constantly and sporadically find myself wondering what will be if I have one here, have one now, have one at work, at school, on the train....but the longer I go without a seizure, the easier it is to tell myself that:"maybe I will have one, but I haven't in a while, and there's no reason to think it HAS to be today. So IF I have one, I'll deal with it then."So even though I still get anxious pretty often, most of the time I can answer myself and kind of "push off" the fear. I hope this is helpful! But just know you're not alone :)Best of luck,B

Honestly dude, my crazy

Submitted by Misjoey101 on Thu, 2019-03-28 - 18:34
Honestly dude, my crazy helicopter parent has made me someone who's less terrified. I grew up with a mom who enforced things like  "______ walk you're sister to the bathroom in case she has a seizure."   That is.....a mom that kept a baby monitor in my room until I was 12 and met with my high school teachers every year. I just wanted to get away to a world where I COULD CARE LESS. Finally, I can AT LEAST ride the bus.  

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