Hey, I'm 14 and had my first seizure when i 11. I've had 4 total, fall of 2009, early 2010, summer of 2011, and a grand mal on the same day as the one this summer. But i havent actually been diagnosed with epilepsy. When i was about 6, i had these moments when my right thumb (and sometimes hand) would start clenching and twitching like tremors. I had a couple of mri's, eeg's, cat scans, etc., but they couldn't find anything wrong so the doctors assumed it would be something i would grow out of. They never thought about it as seizures until i had my first one in 2009. They now think they could be "mini seizures". i still have them if i forget a dose of medication. I'm on oxocarbzepine, which makes me very tired and sometimes i get a sort of "double/blurred" vision. I also have these sort of panic attacks where everything seems sped up and tense. I don't know if these are related to the seizures. All of these things make it hard for me to focus in school and public.
So i just want to know if anyone can relate to any of this. I really wish that since the doctors don't think i actually have epilepsy, i could know what is "wrong with me". Also, has anyone had this and grown out of it? I don't know anyone at my school with seizures, and although my family is really supportive, they cant relate. I have a twin sister, but she doesn't have seizures.
Description of seizure (does anyone know what type this is?): My right hand starts clenching, i start getting blurred vision and i feel like i'm saying something but i'm not sure. I fall to the ground but everything feels numb. My vision sometimes has color around the edges, and it feels like i'm looking at a tv screen rather than through my eyes. I go unconscious, shake, my eyes roll and i sometimes spit. This usually lasts about 30 seconds, then im not fully conscious but i can see flashes of things and people. Can't always remember things. WHen i come too i'm exhausted and usually very emotional (crying and sometimes angry).