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Gui123

Epilepsy and Relationships

No matter how hard I try I can't help but to feel distant. Somehow I always end up being disconnected. I've
Made personal decisions as a person that really destroyed my reputation. There are few people who have a frustrated love for me. I get into moods where I just don't want to talk or everything an everyone just seem distant. My relationship with my family is rocky, one day it's blue skies the next it's a scene out of twister.

I'm far more mature now then I used to be; I wouldn't talk about my epilepsy out of embarrassment and ignorance. I'm still very embarrassed but I will talk about it if asked.

What I want to know is:
How does epilepsy effect the relationships in your life?

Do you get angry very easily ? Are your moods effected by epilepsy?

Are you embarrassed to be the way you are?

Comments

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

I think the medicine really affects my mood. For instance Topamax made me depressed and skinnier. I thought I was going insane and then they took me off of Topamax and I felt better and realized the drug sucked. I'm on keppra now and I blame all of my anger issues on "keppra rages". Keppra is known to make people irritable.

I'm embarrassed about it. I think I had trouble with my social life before and then epilepsy just destroyed it completely, actually. I don't miss people very much because they were never very nice to me.

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

how does epilepsy effect the relationships in your life?

it greatly effects them. Like you, I find myself wanting to just cut myself off from everyone and everything. I feel more comfortable and safe inside my own thoughts. It's not like that all of the time, sometimes it's happiness sunshine and roses...then something small or nothing changes it and it's rain and thunderstorms and another week of seclusion for me. I really related with what you said about peoples love for you "frustrated love" you said it perfectly!

 Do you get angry very easily ? Are your moods effected by epilepsy?

Yes and definately! I think my epilepsy affects my mood and also that my moods affect my epilepsy. I feel like it all goes hand in hand. I have a very rocky romantic relationship that I attribute most of our problems with my moods and seizures. (have you looked at all into bipolar disorder? I know this is touchy but E and bipolar are closely related.)

Are you embarrassed to be the way you are?

Yes I am. theres not much else to say about that :(

~*Ari*~

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

How does epilepsy effect the relationships in your life?

It's tough lost lots of friends who are terrified to be around me,cause they think i'll have a seizure and they'll get in trouble.My dad for a long time didn't understand how serious epilepsy was till he finally saw me have seizure kinda of a plus cause he finally understands,,,,but its a minus at the same time cause he treats me differently.

Do you get angry very easily ? Are your moods effected by epilepsy?

I don't get angry over having seizures in general.I do get mad at the fact that having seizures makes it so much harder to do stuff like work and what not since i have to wake up earlier than i have to so i can wake up slowly in order for my brain not too overload.Sometimes i want to have seizures cause for those 30mins-1hour after them i forget how shitty my life really is.

Are you embarrassed to be the way you are?

No i am not embarrassed  to have epilepsy i have had seizure's in public and woken up to people standing over me looking like they are in more shock than me,i just laugh at them and get up sometimes they try to hold me down thinking i need to go to the hospital sometimes they think i overdosed on drugs or something but i just don't care about having seizures anymore,it's nothing more than annoyance to me if i have a seizure so the fuck what just gotta continue on with my day like anyother day.

 

I've had seizures since i was 13 im 19.For a while i was in denial about having seizures and was very embarrased about having them in public.I don't take any medications cause i would rather have a seizure once in a while then have those side effects constantly,and i've been on all the meds out there.For 2 years i was a drug addict did every drug out there it wasn't my seizures that caused me to get into drugs just the fact that my life sucked so bad for other reason still does but i cleaned my self up by myself and been clean for over a year my only sin is my cigarette.My only advice for you would be to just keep walking forward in life,don't care what people think it's not your promblem to know what they think,and like i said just keep walking maybe something good will happen maybe it wont,who knows,no one does.Good Luck :)

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

I cant seem to find a man who has enough strength to handle my epilepsy. I've come to the point that ive just about givin up on finding someone. My moods are affected a lot by my epilepsy. I can get depressed very easily and often am very silent, i guess you could say i meditate a lot. I can be the happiest person one day and the next feel like killing myself. I am scared to tell people about my problems because of a fear of being shuned. I'ts like i understand what your saying almost exactly...as if i were you.

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

I think there are guys out there for you and if you can share everything with them it would probably be a lot easier to relate. My wife stopped sharing with me how things were going. I think you have to face the fact that epilepsy does things to you and that the medication can change how you interact with loved ones. My wife refuses that to be the case. Hang in there at one point my wife said I was " a good man" on this website....so you will find one.

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

I have recently moved out from my bf:s place. I moved abroad to live with him. I knew he had epilepsy but I had no idea about those mood swings. "Irritable" doesn't quite describe it. He's agressieve, treats me really badly, can be extremely selfish and unfair and his also very jealous. I blame it on his medication, but he won't even talk about it. I don't even recognize him some days.

If he had said something like what you have written here, I would have stayed, but he won't take any responsibility for any of the fights and there seem to be no way I can do anything right in his eyes. I have no energy to put in this relationship anymore. Now it feels like I need to let go because it is ruining me and nothing seems to ever improve. It is really very sad.

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

In my opinion the first step in living with epilepsy is accepting that you have it and that it DOES cause a person to not realize what there acting like sometimes...in my case because of the lack of social interaction i had as a child. When i started having seizers at 12 the school i was going to requested that i go into a home schooling program called home bound because they were scared my seizures would tramatize the other students...so once a week the school sent a teacher to my house instead of me going to school. those close to me tell me that its like i flirt with every guy i meet but im just being nice, too nice i guess. I also get very tence and stressed and when i do it seems as if im angry when im really not but it will cause me to do things like punch pillows or push my self away from people when im in that state. It sounds to me like your ex has a lot to accept about himself still and just needs someone to love and support him. As long as ive had seizures im just now learning to be confident and more independant because in a lot of ways im scared to be alone still. I hope this helps someone, its helping me just to talk about it.

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

I have been married for almost 16 years and my wife has had epilepsy almost 6 I believe. It's been a blur of lack of understanding of medications and lots of side effects from the topomax. My wife wants to live with it but not really face that she has it or that the medication has caused a lot of conflict to our relationship. I have my faults but have always stood by her through all of these tough times. Now she is done with us and I am getting there myself. We have two great boys but I'm worried about our interaction since she has decided we arent't going to be together. It's weird but from everything I have read seems not too uncommon.

Re: Epilepsy and Relationships

the best thing ive ever done is what my heart tells me to do and if u trust ur heart then i think that will help get u through what ur going through cuz sometimes i can have 2 different feelings about one thing and i always trust my heart...just like my ex. i loved him but i had to leave because it was not only what was best for me with a 20 yr age differance but it was what was best for him 2. I just want a guy who i can bond with. theres a poem i favor...maybe because it helps me accept all the ass's in the world.

If you love someone set them free

Ir they come back to you

There yours

If they dont

They never were.