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soccr360
dating in your twenties
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I would like to get you guys experience and advice on dating with this disorder especially in your twenties. The worries and thoughts that one feels before they want to try an date or ask someone out is double!!! How have you guys dealt with it or are dealing with this?
By soccr360 at Tue, 11/03/2009 - 5:06pm | 43 views | 3 comments
Topic: Dating and Epilepsy
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Name: Dating and Epilepsy
Since: Nov 29, 2007
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Recent Comments on this Discussion
I am married but I have a friend who also has a seizure disorder. Her seizures started when she was 19 and she is only 22. She just started seeing this guy and she came to me for advice. She asked me if she should tell him about her epilepsy and, how and when in the relationship is it appropriate. She was really scared about him not being able to handle the information or not wanting to date someone who was "sick" She's still trying to learn how to live her life with a seizure disorder.
At the time I told her that honesty was the best policy. I have always been upfront with friends and boyfriends about my seizures because I although I get auras I can't always predict when they are going to happen. I told her if he couldn't handle the fact that she had seizures then he couldn't handle being with her and he wasn't worth her time.
Now though I have started to think about that a lot. Do people try to hide epilepsy from the people they are seeing? Honestly it never occurred to me to hide it. Is there a protocol for this sort of thing? Does it scare potential partners away? Should I have told her something else?
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
Hey!!
Okay well here's what I think. I think epilepsy is just a title. I totally get why it's hard to put yourself out there and all, but if you don't how will you ever know. K I'm still in high school but two years ago I had a seizure in the pool at a swim meet. After the meet this guy came up and was like hey are you okay. And I just explained what my condition was. We ended up dating for over a year. He actually wanted to learn about it. Like it's okay to be scared or embarrassed of what peoples reaction will be, because for the most part you would never know. But if this person is into you, clearly they're into YOU. And whateve comes with you they'll just have to get used to.
I am in my 20s, married now. But when I was dating I was completly honest. I think it is important to tell anyone you plan on having any sort of relationship with that you have a seizure disorder even if they are controlled. All family, friends, coworkers, pretty much anyone that is or comes into your "bubble". If you plan on asking out a stranger though I don't think you should just blurt it out just tell the person naturally however if it were me I would tell them before the night was over. I always explain to people that I have epilepsy if they don't know what it is I just say it's a seizure disorder. It is usually controlled by medication however I have break throughs occationally. I have never had a problem with anybody being weirded out by me or my having epilepsy. When I first started dating my husband I actually had a grand mal seizure (it was kind of embarassing) he just called 911 and was just worried for me. So again just let the person know on the first date, if they are weirded out by it then it is better that you didn't waste your time with a second date on them.