One I was so busy, I started to put funny things on my answering machine. Hope yoo enjoy this too.

Hello,Hello, Sorry my machine doesn't want to talk with you. Leave name & number, later I might want too.

My answering machine says, I'm out to lunch. So leave your name & number, I'll call when it says I can come home.

My answering machine says No, Leave your name and number, I might say yes

  the favorite:

My brain's in a jar and the lids on to tight. Leave your name & number after the beep. And call a locksmith if you don't hear from me in a week.

I would change them every few weeks, soon people were calling to hear the next one! haha  

You suck and thats sad.

Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things.

Cute but kinda evil.

Not caring is fun!

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.!

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

 I'm getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose. Some parts of my body are just prone to swinging.

THE SENILITY PRAYER : Grant me the senility to forget the people I
never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the
eyesight to tell the difference.

-Spiz 

~We all matter, even when we haven't the slightest clue why~

CHARLES SCHULTZ PHILOSOPHY

You don't actually have to take the quiz. Just read this straight
through and you'll get the point. It is trying to make an awesome
point!

Here's the first quiz:

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America contest.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The facts are, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday.
These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields.
But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten.
Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

6. Name half a dozen heroes whose stories have inspired you.

Easier?

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are
not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most
awards. They are the ones that care.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today ...... It's already tomorrow in Australia."

----- Charles Schulz-----

-Spiz 

~We all matter, even when we haven't the slightest clue why~

Bumper Sticker: Work like you don't need the money, Dance like no one's watching you, Love like you've never been hurt.

T-shirt: I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every moment of it.

Answering Machine Recording: Hello?
(short pause) Hellooo? (Waits again) Helloooo - Who is this?

Signs: In a non-smoking area - If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.

On a repair shop door: We can repair anything. (Please knock hard - bell out of order.)

-Spiz 

 ~ We all matter, even when we haven't the slightest clue why ~