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Epilepsy and college..
Fri, 11/19/2004 - 10:47I'm going to college in a month. Although I am a commuter student, I'm scared of how I'm going to handle college. See, I was absent..a lot in high school when I was diagnosed with epilepsy. I had about 5 seizures over the course of my senior year and a lot of traumatic things happened to me which made me feel really down and hurt my grades a bit-for instance, not being able to drive.
I'm supposed to find out this week if i can finally drive again..oh how I love the New Jersey DMV...heh obviously sarcasm there. Anyway, I'm panicing about everything. I'm scared I'm gonna crack up when I get the work load which I know is going to be hell. I'm scared if I don't get my license back before september I wont be able to drive and my mom will have to drive me which will be really embarrassing and upset me a great deal. I've been waiting since September.
I've been in such a depression all summer..I haven't even left my room and I barely talk to my friends anymore or go out with them when they invite me places. The last thing I wanna do is go back to school..college no less where I won't know my way around, dont know about the teachers or how much work I'll have to deal with, and I don't know a soul there and see I'm a really shy person and every year since I was little I've cried on the first day of school. I know that's pathetic since I'm 18 now but it always happens.
I quit my job when I got epilepsy and lately I was trying to get another job but now my mom and dad dont want me to cuz we got my schedule for college and it's ridiculous..I wont have time for anything much less a job.
So basically I'm really losing it...I'm so scared and alone and upset and I just wanna run away and never come out of my room or something..I dont even wanna go to college..in fact my mom and I thought about not sending me for a year b/c of the epilepsy and the driving situation..God if any of you have been through this I beg you please respond!!!!!!!! I need support more than ever, God I just need something to hold on to..
Comments
RE: RE: Epilepsy and college..
Submitted by Galinda on Thu, 2004-07-29 - 14:58
Well since I had seizures after the first one in September I'd actually have to wait till January if I don't get it back in the 6 month term..which would have been last month if the dmv got back to us. Anyway, I don't want to put my life on hold..I guess it's just tempting when life just gets too hard and it's just really hard to keep going on. I'm going regardless, I'm just scared about how I'm going to react and really what's going to happen. My mom's a nurse and she said stress can bring on a seizure..and I like hyperventilate every year on the first day of school..and this isn't grade school anymore...this is college.
Aside from all that, I'm majoring in English but I'm actually thinking about law. This whole driver's license "mandatory reporting law" is very unfair. It goes against patient doctor confidentiality and most states don't have that law...ah leave it to NJ. I did all this research on it just to learn more about why they made this law and why so many other states outlawed it.
Anyway, I'm minoring in music. I have trained at the westminster choir conservatory and have been working on my voice for 5 years. I sing classical, opera music mostly cuz my range is more comfortable there than in a lower pop kinda voice..although I still enjoy singing that kind of music too. I've been singing since I was little but didn't start taking lessons till 8th grade. I love it, in fact I almost went to the Westminster Choir College but my teacher and my mom changed my mind since having a BA in music isn't going to open as many doors as a BA in English for instance. I still think about going there though.
Sorry I kinda rambled but I figured I'd give u an explanation bout my bitterness towards the dmv and why I was so depressed and all. Thanks for responding.
Well since I had seizures after the first one in September I'd actually have to wait till January if I don't get it back in the 6 month term..which would have been last month if the dmv got back to us. Anyway, I don't want to put my life on hold..I guess it's just tempting when life just gets too hard and it's just really hard to keep going on. I'm going regardless, I'm just scared about how I'm going to react and really what's going to happen. My mom's a nurse and she said stress can bring on a seizure..and I like hyperventilate every year on the first day of school..and this isn't grade school anymore...this is college.
Aside from all that, I'm majoring in English but I'm actually thinking about law. This whole driver's license "mandatory reporting law" is very unfair. It goes against patient doctor confidentiality and most states don't have that law...ah leave it to NJ. I did all this research on it just to learn more about why they made this law and why so many other states outlawed it.
Anyway, I'm minoring in music. I have trained at the westminster choir conservatory and have been working on my voice for 5 years. I sing classical, opera music mostly cuz my range is more comfortable there than in a lower pop kinda voice..although I still enjoy singing that kind of music too. I've been singing since I was little but didn't start taking lessons till 8th grade. I love it, in fact I almost went to the Westminster Choir College but my teacher and my mom changed my mind since having a BA in music isn't going to open as many doors as a BA in English for instance. I still think about going there though.
Sorry I kinda rambled but I figured I'd give u an explanation bout my bitterness towards the dmv and why I was so depressed and all. Thanks for responding.
RE: Epilepsy and college..
Submitted by Ragnarz on Thu, 2004-07-29 - 13:09
What do you plan to major in at college? Just curious.
Been there and have gone through all of the same. But, I didn't put my life on hold or decide not to go to college. Obviously, you passed high school and have been accepted to a college, even after 5 seizures and lossing your driving privilage. Personally, I'd feel embarrassed if, I didn't go on to college and at least try. There have been a great number of people throughout history who've had diabilities and have done great things. If, you are going to get your DL back in Sept. that means you've been seizure free for at least a year. ( NJ Law requires you to be seizure free for one year before you can have your driving privilege reinstated.)Right!? Everybody gets scared whether they have epilepsy or not! But, It's up to you to confront your fear and deal with it.
What do you plan to major in at college? Just curious.