How Do You Cope?

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I was diagnosed 5 months ago and I'm not coping well. My family insults me and refuses to educate themselves on my condition (they assume it's "common sense" and they already know). So, I've found that it helps to cope with pills and alcohol, cutting, journaling, etc... What are some ways you cope when you have no one in person to talk to and are constantly insulted and let down by people who claim to care about you?

Comments

Re: How Do You Cope?

Submitted by Chrissyml on Sun, 2012-05-13 - 02:31

Why exactly do you feel insulted and put down?

Re: How Do You Cope?

Submitted by rosanna1980 on Sun, 2012-05-13 - 09:57

My family insults me all the time. They are getting tired of helping me out and feel i'm exaggerating. They know nothing about epilepsy and refuse to read and find out, even though i've asked so many times. They say things like "just get in your car and go find a job!". They know I can't drive or work. But, they talk to me as if i'm just pitiful. I'm sick of it.

Re: How Do You Cope?

Submitted by pewter on Sun, 2012-05-13 - 20:20

when i was first diagnosed in 2008, I was told by my neurologist that I was not to drive, etc.. all the safety precautions. My state requires only that you voluntarily turn in your license and/or withhold driving UNLESS a physician does deem you to dangerous and files a legal petition. Otherwise, the physician is only to warn and advise. The first, second, and third Neurologist has warned (all residents in a teaching hospital).

"the family" decided that this was too much of an inconvenience, a burden, an obligation on them. So, the 3 family members I have that I would have to rely upon - primarily - to assist... all said to me "you can drive. Just get in your car and go anywhere you want to go. You must work, you have no choice, we are not going to tote you back and forth everyday and we are not going to assist you. So, you are going to have to keep working and you will continue to drive everywhere you need to go because we will not be obligated to try and figure, or assist you, everyday to get back and forth. If you "feel" one of your "spells" coming on, while driving, you immediately stop or immediately pull over and stop, even if you are in the middle of traffic, you stop or pull over, do you hear?"

You know what? Only on 3 occasions for which I had a seizure while working, did they come to pick me up and take me home because my employer refused to allow me to drive myself home.

They used to not believe that I had seizures because for the most part, no one "sees" them. It's just me and my teenage daughter. She has seen many of them, or have caught me at the end of them. The rest of the family has not. My previous employer (was laid off in January, partly due to the seizures) witnessed 3 in 1 year.

It wasn't until my previous employer had the ambulance called with 1 seizure, and my elderly Dad actually witness 1 himself... that anyone, outside my daughter, believed me. Course, that doesn't urge them to assist. However, I do tend to "ride" more when we all go out and luckily my daughter now has her driver's permit, so she does most of the driving. Yet, for the last 3-4 years....

Long rambling but, your reply/post sparked something and well.. I wanted you to know that you aren't alone in this... you really are not.

when i was first diagnosed in 2008, I was told by my neurologist that I was not to drive, etc.. all the safety precautions.  My state requires only that you voluntarily turn in your license and/or withhold driving UNLESS a physician does deem you to dangerous and files a legal petition.  Otherwise, the physician is only to warn and advise.  The first, second, and third Neurologist has warned (all residents in a teaching hospital). "the family" decided that this was too much of an inconvenience, a burden, an obligation on them.  So, the 3 family members I have that I would have to rely upon - primarily - to assist... all said to me "you can drive.  Just get in your car and go anywhere you want to go.  You must work, you have no choice, we are not going to tote you back and forth everyday and we are not going to assist you.  So, you are going to have to keep working and you will continue to drive everywhere you need to go because we will not be obligated to try and figure, or assist you, everyday to get back and forth.  If you "feel" one of your "spells" coming on, while driving, you immediately stop or immediately pull over and stop, even if you are in the middle of traffic, you stop or pull over, do you hear?" You know what?  Only on 3 occasions for which I had a seizure while working, did they come to pick me up and take me home because my employer refused to allow me to drive myself home. They used to not believe that I had seizures because for the most part, no one "sees" them.  It's just me and my teenage daughter.  She has seen many of them, or have caught me at the end of them.  The rest of the family has not.  My previous employer (was laid off in January, partly due to the seizures) witnessed 3 in 1 year. It wasn't until my previous employer had the ambulance called with 1 seizure, and my elderly Dad actually witness 1 himself... that anyone, outside my daughter, believed me.  Course, that doesn't urge them to assist.  However, I do tend to "ride" more when we all go out and luckily my daughter now has her driver's permit, so she does most of the driving.  Yet, for the last 3-4 years.... Long rambling but, your reply/post sparked something and well.. I wanted you to know that you aren't alone in this... you really are not.    

when i was first diagnosed in 2008, I was told by my neurologist that I was not to drive, etc.. all the safety precautions. My state requires only that you voluntarily turn in your license and/or withhold driving UNLESS a physician does deem you to dangerous and files a legal petition. Otherwise, the physician is only to warn and advise. The first, second, and third Neurologist has warned (all residents in a teaching hospital).

"the family" decided that this was too much of an inconvenience, a burden, an obligation on them. So, the 3 family members I have that I would have to rely upon - primarily - to assist... all said to me "you can drive. Just get in your car and go anywhere you want to go. You must work, you have no choice, we are not going to tote you back and forth everyday and we are not going to assist you. So, you are going to have to keep working and you will continue to drive everywhere you need to go because we will not be obligated to try and figure, or assist you, everyday to get back and forth. If you "feel" one of your "spells" coming on, while driving, you immediately stop or immediately pull over and stop, even if you are in the middle of traffic, you stop or pull over, do you hear?"

You know what? Only on 3 occasions for which I had a seizure while working, did they come to pick me up and take me home because my employer refused to allow me to drive myself home.

They used to not believe that I had seizures because for the most part, no one "sees" them. It's just me and my teenage daughter. She has seen many of them, or have caught me at the end of them. The rest of the family has not. My previous employer (was laid off in January, partly due to the seizures) witnessed 3 in 1 year.

It wasn't until my previous employer had the ambulance called with 1 seizure, and my elderly Dad actually witness 1 himself... that anyone, outside my daughter, believed me. Course, that doesn't urge them to assist. However, I do tend to "ride" more when we all go out and luckily my daughter now has her driver's permit, so she does most of the driving. Yet, for the last 3-4 years....

Long rambling but, your reply/post sparked something and well.. I wanted you to know that you aren't alone in this... you really are not.

How Do You Cope?

Comments

Re: How Do You Cope?

Submitted by Chrissyml on Sun, 2012-05-13 - 02:31

Re: How Do You Cope?

Submitted by rosanna1980 on Sun, 2012-05-13 - 09:57

Re: How Do You Cope?

Submitted by pewter on Sun, 2012-05-13 - 20:20

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