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I just want to give up

Tue, 01/16/2007 - 19:06
To anyone who will listen: Over the past few weeks, my wife described to me “episodes”, which she claims I was having. I of course, have no reason to doubt her, but don’t remember them. The first ones were describe as me just standing at the kitchen counter, staring off in the distance with a blank look and not responding to her questions. She stated that these “episodes” would only last for a minute or two. About two weeks ago, she told me that after I went to bed she heard a loud noise, came upstairs and found me sitting on the floor. I responded to her questions, had the same blank stare and she led me into bed. The next morning I had no memory of the incident. I must add that during all these events there was no twitching or strange movements of the eyes or other body parts. Just yesterday, I went to see a neurologist for an exam. After completing same, he scheduled me for a CAT scan and started me on Keppra. You know, just in case. Being 51 years of age and never having had anything like this happen before, I am shocked to think that I may have Epilepsy. While my state does not require the Doctor to report his findings, he has stated that he does not want me to drive. Needless to say, that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I don’t know if I can handle the lost of independence, as well as the emasculating feeling of not being able to drive brings. Any advice before I do what I’ve been contemplating since this arose?

Comments

Re: I just want to give up

Submitted by angel_lts on Tue, 2007-01-16 - 21:38
First off you plan to do something crazy, it is just that, crazy! I have had epilepsy for 37 years. If I did something crazy years ago, I would not have married, had my four children, watch them grow..... I live a very happy life style with my seizures. You will adjust to the news. It is very hard at first but you will get by. You must start searching and getting knowledge about the disorder. You just have fear right now. But once you learn more the fear will go away. Dont worry you will learn to adjust and things will start to look better. Please call someone or go talk with a pyschologist to help you through this hard time. But please stick around and you will learn so much more here. Take care Lisa http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/epilepsyapproach/

Re: I just want to give up

Submitted by heathersmithers on Wed, 2007-01-17 - 00:11
Hi Baker,,, Lisa summed it up rather nicely....smile.. Myself im 41 3 kids,, no drivers license.. was dx 6 years ago with epilepsly and 7 months ago with MS,,, You have to give yourslef time to adjust to the diagnoss that you have been given,, You also have to give yourself and your neuro time to work with the meds to gain seziure control,, Just because your neuro does not want you to drive at the present time does not mean that it is permenant... You have already taken a big step by seeking out a support group like this where you can gain valuable information and ask so many questions. I know that when i was first diagnosed with both epilepsly and MS it was like going through a greiving process,, after that you learn to adjust and fight back by becomming active in your own care... You will get there just hang on,, talk with someone,, your wife,, a counsller,, someone at your church... Just hang on...it will get easier.. Heather

Re: I just want to give up

Submitted by gwen48 on Wed, 2007-01-17 - 08:02
The Baker: Hi! The state of panic you describe is just what it is. PANIC! It is your reaction to a new possible diagnosis of epilepsy. Normal reaction, and welcome to the human race. Besides, none of us wants our independence taken away. I have lived with this for 30 years. I am not saying it is easy, and am here to validate your dilemma. I work full time, have raised two great kids. Life is good, and have had some bad times. Got to have some coping mechanisms for those. The suggestions above are all good. Surround yourself with family and friends, busy yourself, like talking to us. Work with your doctor, and, do not forget humor. It has an amazing capacity to heal. Cry if you need to, it is a self cleansing that allows us to re-group. Best of luck and write again - Gwen

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