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Feeling kinda lost. Rant!

Tue, 12/13/2016 - 04:41
Hey everyone , I was diagnosed with Epilepsy a year ago, and been on lamotrigine. I started on 50 mg a day and now on 200mg a day. Before I was diagnosed , I had 10 years of every test going, I was told i had post traumatic stress disorder, depression / anxiety /vertigo. It was the ENT consultant that spotted there was something else going on. I get strong de ja vu and go very weak with flashbacks, my whole body goes weak. I lose my memory of things such as my house number for abit after a seizure. and would be very tired and drained. I had a 20 min EEG which was inconclusive then had a 24 hour EEG which i was told showed multiple chemical changes typical of epilepsy. That's all ive been told and i feel like im just exhausted all the time , detached from everything, weak. I think that's the tablets causing that? Ive tried to just deal with it but im a single parent and trying my best to keep up with everything, I asked my consultant about the epilepsy , was i having them at night? how often in the day? , what time of day?. ( i was told to keep a diary over the 24 hours so i could try match it up to see any pattern) but when i ask him if i can see the results or know more , he gets defensive and smirks and says well we pulled the info we needed , you're on medication there's nothing more to say. Im at a point now where i feel like is it worth taking the tablets. At least i felt some what normal when not having seizures. I think im in denile that I have epilepsy, My family dont seem to understand how life controlling this is at the moment , they think its something i can just turn off. My problems I was having have all stopped since taking the tablets but i feel like im just existing and dazed all the time. Sorry for the long rant , just needed to vent. I know stopping the meds would be dangerous but im really fed up of it.

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