I had a breakdown earlier this morning. I woke up at 3:00 am and just started crying. I just thought about everything that has happened since the beginning of July to what is going to happen in the next couple of months regarding the Epilepsy surgery that I might receive. I'm so scared out of mind. I have stayed strong for so long until it all fell crashing down. The thought of going through brain surgery is scary for anyone. The only thing that is kind of keeping me from going overboard with my stress is the fact that I am educating myself on this procedure. But I still feel like my emotional stress is not going to go away fully. My siblings say that I am such a emotional person but in reality, they do not know what is going on with me in the INSIDE. Even if I try to explain it to them, they will never understand unless they have went through it themselves. They don't understand the worries and fears that go along with being a person with Epilepsy and the hardships that we have to face. They never asked, "How's everything going with your surgery testing baby sis?" I don't hear nothing. Look at myself worrying and stressing about this bullsh*t when I need to be focusing on how I am going to deal with this all. This could possibly lead to another seizure.
Can anyone give me some insight on how to deal with this? Can anyone give me any information on what happens after you get out of surgery? Any information will be helpful to me. Thank you.