Husband with Seizures

RE: Husband with Seizures

Submitted by Gretchen on Mon, 2005-01-31 - 10:30

Hi MaryI'm the epileptic spouse but I read your post to my husband who isn't signed up here but I can give you his response, coupled with my "editorial comments".For one thing I sz a lot more than your husband which I think does change our two pictures. He's more used to it probably which we both agreed we'd hate to call it an edge for us over you, I would sure hate to say that, but in a way I can see it too. We have this down to a science now.My son, father (deceased) and grand daughter also have epilepsy, so I also raised an epileptic son. There were some times when he had a seizure it scared me witless. If I got that frightened? Also if I had any situation with him I couldn't handle or felt I needed support? I called an ambulance. Maybe more for me than him but that's okay. Do it. You count too. If your husband doesn't need transport they will still be there to help you and him. We've never been charged in 3 communi9ties if I'm not transported. My husband did this frequently right after I was diagnosed. Usually I do need transport to the ER but even if I was recovering by the time they got there? I can get REAL combative from fear. Fear over what? Nothing and everything. The mind is recovering, not reacting in the usual manner - post ictal. I always have to go to the bathroom right after a bad t/c (grand mal) and usually before my legs are working.Another difference we have most likely over the both of you is that I'm smaller and lighter than my spouse. So my husband can help me more than likely easier than you can support your husband BUT when people try to haul me up to my feet or try to help me walk? It hurts me under my arms or my ribs, where ever they're clutching me. I'm not that heavy but a nearly dead weight in an adult is hard on anyone.What I worked out with my son and I do the same thing is we crawl to the bathroom. Crawl to a piece of furniture to pull ourselves up to sit in too. We're both very suggestive. IF someone doesn't start getting very excited and demanding in their voice but coaches us firmly but gently and don't feel threatening and repeatedly tell me to crawl, I do. Pretty much now on my own I'm "trained". It took awhile of falling, sz'ing, trying to get up, falling again. The problem for me as the sz'ing person is? My cognition is so reduced I can't figure out how to get to the bathroom I just know my bladder sphincter is letting loose and I feel desperate to get to the bathroom.I'm also an RN who worked in L&D for years. Often a family member would faint right after a delivery of a baby. If a person fainted often they'd try to bolt right back up on very unsteady legs. If that person such as a man usually, the husband, would be "legless" or nearly so? I'd grasp tightly their belt from behind with both hands to help them stay upright, spread my legs to get a wide solid stance to help them to a chair. That too depended on how big the person was and how combative. Then there are times? People are going to sz, try to get up too soon, and fall again and there isn't anything you can do about it. I did learn eventually and so did my husband. He has had a lot of frustration and is in the continual process of learning, and realizing he does the best he can. That's the very best you can do. You care about him. That's a lot right there. But anyway a very non threatening voice suggesting I crawl will usually direct both my son and I to crawl into the bathroom. A few times with my son I've given him a towel and told him to put it between his legs and just let it go, towels can be washed. He usually will. I weigh about 120 pounds, he weighs 225. I can't safely get him to the bathroom. One of the problems with trying to support someone into the bathroom is all the very hard things a person can whack their head on if they fall. That's why years ago with him, and now with me, we try to do the crawling thing.Good luckGretchen