Community Forum Archive
The Epilepsy Community Forums are closed, and the information is archived. The content in this section may not be current or apply to all situations. In addition, forum questions and responses include information and content that has been generated by epilepsy community members. This content is not moderated. The information on these pages should not be substituted for medical advice from a healthcare provider. Experiences with epilepsy can vary greatly on an individual basis. Please contact your doctor or medical team if you have any questions about your situation. For more information, learn about epilepsy or visit our resources section.
Some Poems
Sat, 04/18/2009 - 20:27Thanks for reading :)
I’m wasting too much time
Counting pills and spending dimes
Convincing myself that I belong
Telling the world there’s nothing wrong
I’m organized no doubt
But I take the long route
The more complicated the scam
The more brilliant I am
I hold on to the remote control
And it sure has taken its toll
Orange bottles in a line
Keep telling me I’m not fine
The grass hasn’t been green
Since the river was clean
Who will now mend
Our most overlooked friend
And the sky is still blue
But the sun became two
One bathed us all
The other made us fall
The bells sure did ring
And the rebel band did sing
But we stayed in the kitchen
So no one could listen
I looked up to the sky
And I wanted to fly
But that’s how I found
Myself tangled and bound
No longer alone when I’m by myself
A voice that comforts and corrupts is with me
It’s been a visitor for a while but I didn’t notice
I still don’t acknowledge it to a degree
Why did it come to buzz in my head
To tell me what I should and shouldn’t consider
It has kept me quiet, distant, and unfriendly
Unloyal, untruthful and also bitter
Then I told someone because I was scared
But I regret speaking it out loud
It’s telling me I should hate myself
Hate all the strangers in the crowd
I pushed away my closest friends
To save them from my defeated eyes
I miss them dearly but it doesn’t matter
They pass like clouds do in the skies
The tasks seems so helpless today
I’m so far down should I even try climbing out
How will they ever forgive me now
When all I’ve done is be silent and shout
Still they fight for what is right
The true heroes of our short but sweet time
But the wall I’ve built around myself
Is just too high for them to climb
I’ll go to bed and wake up again
Every day until it ends
My art is gone from my hands and heart
But I will still have my friends
My memories I have fake or real
Help me hold onto the place I’m in
I need to know where that place is
Maybe one day I’ll finally win
I don’t want to speak
I don’t want to listen
I don’t want anything
Alone in my room
My home
My cocoon
Or under the table
I’m sturdy
And able
To be alone
Sometimes I forget where I am
Even while I’m sitting there
Out again last night
I stayed out of sight
Hiding from everything bright
The shadows they cried
When I tried to hide
Begging to let them inside
They were calm and kind
I went along for the ride
And they drove me out of my mind
Tomorrow is coming
But I’ll keep on running
To stop it from catching me
I don’t want to go home
I can make it on my own
Just please leave me alone
Lonely quiet and still
Is the way I get my thrill
And everything is under the mill
If you try and get me today
You won’t be able to pull me away
For I am here in the dark night to stay
Out of my mind
I went outside
My cold feet roamed around
Out of the light
And into the night
Deeper, and deeper I drown
The world sure did change
Slightly rearranged
But never was I bent
Everything I feared
Slowly disappeared
So deeper, and deeper I went
I left everything behind
And all you can find
Is a body paler then most
Out of your reach
And ignoring your speech
Deeper, and deeper I coast
I’m just rolling around
All over the ground
But never did I call
Now you can’t see me
And I’m finally free
So deeper, and deeper I fall
Suddenly, I feel so alone
And I’m tired, I just want to go home
It’s too dark to see, it’s not right for me
But the rope is gone, I can’t hold on
A face shedding tears
Slowly appears
You sit down at my side
I take your hand
You help me to stand
You tell me I don’t have to hide
I never learned how to draw the line
How to stand out, how to shine
All I had with me turned to stone
Cut through my skin, reach the bone
All my colors turned to black
Will the rainbow ever come back?
I try to listen but you won’t speak
I would stand up, but I’m too weak
All alone where nothing matters
Everything I love, torn in tatters
Sleepless nights and endless days
Can’t unlock my insensible gaze
It’s all too much at one time to bear
And what’s worse, no one will care
I can’t even listen when I try
My voice is silent, my throat is dry
Where does this leave me tonight?
Lost in shadows, out of sight?
Numbing fingers and itchy feet
Bare and cold on the concrete
So why won’t anyone reach out a hand?
Doesn’t anyone out there understand?
Don’t leave me here to loose my mind
Please, just don’t leave me behind
I look at pictures of my self
And wonder who it is
I don’t remember smiling
Looking happy to be alive
The mirror gives me no smiling face
No confidence or encouragement
I want to be back in those pictures
So I could be immortally cheerful
I cry at night to help me sleep
I cry in the morning to get awake
It seems my mind is never settled
I regret every decision I’ve ever made
I’ve been called crazy and troubled
My soul is one to be saved
Racing, running, rushing,
So much more in on the line
Standing up and always spinning
And all this time I say “I’m fine.”
Re: Some Poems
Submitted by rikk on Sun, 2009-04-19 - 01:08
well teener, again all i can say is thanks. rikk