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Not coping well
Sat, 11/20/2010 - 03:26
Hey, I have just joined because of the reason that even after 3 years.. I have still not come to terms with having Temporal Lobe Epilepsy (after a brain virus).. All through school I kept it a secret except for my close friends, mainly because this other girl with epilepsy was really badly bullied - and my fits were not like hers at all. I have a complete memory wipe out, and I didnt want people to judge me or stereotype me.
I only ever had one fit in school, around my GCSES, and I sat in the corridor with my best friend and then a few seconds later my mind was wiped. I was crying, screaming, i didnt know where i was/who anyone was.
The next day people asked what happened, and I managed to just say i had a panic attack..
Well anyway, now im at college on a HEALTH care course.. and i thought people would 1.be more mature, and 2. these people wanna be nurses.. well i started getting left out of nights out, and i thought oh maybe they just dont like me.. not so bothered about that.. but then i found out its because they are scared im gonna have a fit and wreck their night They also said I am a liability. I have never had anybody say something so hurtful to me.
So im just generally fed up, I have never really accepted that I have epilepsy but I was dealing with it, yeh I did have my downdays but most of the time I was alright because I have great friends.. But these comments have totally made me at a all time low..
I know I shouldnt listen, but it did really hurt, and now i dont want to tell ANYBODY anymore.. until i know them and trust them, but sometimes people do need to know despite that :\
I need cheering up and none of my friends understand what its like, and i dont expect them too. thats why i joined this website. xx
Comments
Re: Not coping well
Submitted by maryrocks on Sat, 2010-11-20 - 14:12
Re: Not coping well
Submitted by abelle on Sat, 2010-11-20 - 17:37
Hello amy1993. Do yourself a favor, just be you. I tried to be something I wasn't and hurt myself more. I had a job that was hard physically and mentally. I was so determined to be "normal" that I didn't tell anyone about my epilepsy. I "over" did the work and everything trying to show everyone I was like them. No problems with me, I was fine! It took years but now I will share it with others. It hurt me when I started having my bladder release at work with the staring spells, etc... My bosses comment, "Why didn't you tell me?" She was right. I should not have been ashamed of it.
It's not the disability that defines you. It's how you deal with challenges the disability presents you with. We have an obligation to the "abilities" we do have, not the disability. Jim Abbott
Hello amy1993. Do yourself a favor, just be you. I tried to be something I wasn't and hurt myself more. I had a job that was hard physically and mentally. I was so determined to be "normal" that I didn't tell anyone about my epilepsy. I "over" did the work and everything trying to show everyone I was like them. No problems with me, I was fine! It took years but now I will share it with others. It hurt me when I started having my bladder release at work with the staring spells, etc... My bosses comment, "Why didn't you tell me?" She was right. I should not have been ashamed of it.
It's not the disability that defines you. It's how you deal with challenges the disability presents you with. We have an obligation to the "abilities" we do have, not the disability. Jim Abbott
Re: Not coping well
Submitted by rossfin on Sat, 2010-11-20 - 13:00
Hi Amy,
It sounds like your feeling irritated and strained by this. I would say you have a lot to offer to whomever would want to be around you, finnicky childish responses to you have hurt you the most and y'know what you can be bigger and better than that, if its healthcare your studying, imagine how receptive to others you are likely to be, how much more understanding, making a little difference to someone can mean a lot to ourselves.
You will meet and make great freinds and eventually you will harden to those who dont have a lot to offer.
Ross
Hi Amy,
It sounds like your feeling irritated and strained by this. I would say you have a lot to offer to whomever would want to be around you, finnicky childish responses to you have hurt you the most and y'know what you can be bigger and better than that, if its healthcare your studying, imagine how receptive to others you are likely to be, how much more understanding, making a little difference to someone can mean a lot to ourselves.
You will meet and make great freinds and eventually you will harden to those who dont have a lot to offer.
Ross