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Child custody, divorce, and Epilepsy

Wed, 06/11/2008 - 16:20
My wife is divorcing me(partially due to my epilepsy) and seeking full custody of our child(ren) primarily due to my epilepsy.  The judge has granted me temporary 50% shared physical and joint legal custody while a court appointed custody investigator makes a recommendation.  I care about my daughter and she is the light of my life.  Losing custody of her would be devistating.  Any advice, help, or support would be greatly appreciated.

Comments

Re: Child custody, divorce, and Epilepsy

Submitted by Aurora06 on Wed, 2008-06-11 - 20:48

well, my daughter being only 22 months old, what she can comprehend is a little limited, but I try to share with her what I can.  No idea when they will happen.  I currently live with my parents who help me with Aurora and also help with transportation.  And thanks for the support.

 

Pat

well, my daughter being only 22 months old, what she can comprehend is a little limited, but I try to share with her what I can.  No idea when they will happen.  I currently live with my parents who help me with Aurora and also help with transportation.  And thanks for the support.

 

Pat

Re: Child custody, divorce, and Epilepsy

Submitted by chesyne6 on Mon, 2008-06-30 - 01:01

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. I too have had seizures since I was 11yrs. old. I have a 21yr. old daughter and she's never seen me have a seizure. My ex husband never saw me have a seizure either but he also worked in the medical field. I haven't had a seizure in 7yrs. but I still take my meds. I take Depakote.

It sounds like your wife is being immature on what's happening to you. Have ya'll gone to marriage  counseling or has she even talked to your dr. about what to do when you have a seizure, or what to do if a child sees their dad have one. There always needs to be communication about any kind of disorders. That's the only way a relationship can survive.

I'm assuming your wife knew you had seizures or did she? I know some people don't want anybody to know-out of embarressment or some other reason. I've told men up front  that I have seizures and I always watch their expressions when they receive that news. Some can take it and others can't. Luckily I'm dating a mature man who had seizures himself from a brain tumor. He was able to have it removed so he's now seizure free. He's a good man who is concerned about my health.

All of my friends know I have seizures and the majority of my friends work in the health field with me. I've been lucky in my jobs compared to other people on this site. I've always worked in the health industry and told my employers up front about my seizures. They've never said a thing about it. I work in a hospital now dealing with hearts and the RNs there are very concerned with my health and watch out for me if I'm extremely tired or I've hit my head on a chair or corner of a short wall when bent over.

Good luck with both of your cases and I hope everything works out for the best for you!! You might want to suggest that your wife attend some kind of meetings about seizures. I'm sure you've heard this expression before........Never judge a book by it's cover.....well your wife could use some help in that dept.

Hopefully the court will talk to qualified people in the medical field that know about seizures and the affects it can have on not only the particular person having the seizure but also their family.

Keep your chin up! I believe everything will work out for the best. As I said before, Good luck with everything!!

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. I too have had seizures since I was 11yrs. old. I have a 21yr. old daughter and she's never seen me have a seizure. My ex husband never saw me have a seizure either but he also worked in the medical field. I haven't had a seizure in 7yrs. but I still take my meds. I take Depakote.

It sounds like your wife is being immature on what's happening to you. Have ya'll gone to marriage  counseling or has she even talked to your dr. about what to do when you have a seizure, or what to do if a child sees their dad have one. There always needs to be communication about any kind of disorders. That's the only way a relationship can survive.

I'm assuming your wife knew you had seizures or did she? I know some people don't want anybody to know-out of embarressment or some other reason. I've told men up front  that I have seizures and I always watch their expressions when they receive that news. Some can take it and others can't. Luckily I'm dating a mature man who had seizures himself from a brain tumor. He was able to have it removed so he's now seizure free. He's a good man who is concerned about my health.

All of my friends know I have seizures and the majority of my friends work in the health field with me. I've been lucky in my jobs compared to other people on this site. I've always worked in the health industry and told my employers up front about my seizures. They've never said a thing about it. I work in a hospital now dealing with hearts and the RNs there are very concerned with my health and watch out for me if I'm extremely tired or I've hit my head on a chair or corner of a short wall when bent over.

Good luck with both of your cases and I hope everything works out for the best for you!! You might want to suggest that your wife attend some kind of meetings about seizures. I'm sure you've heard this expression before........Never judge a book by it's cover.....well your wife could use some help in that dept.

Hopefully the court will talk to qualified people in the medical field that know about seizures and the affects it can have on not only the particular person having the seizure but also their family.

Keep your chin up! I believe everything will work out for the best. As I said before, Good luck with everything!!

Re: Child custody, divorce, and Epilepsy

Submitted by bleedingheart on Fri, 2008-07-04 - 17:07
I am not a parent but I can sympathize. Given that your wife seems to be  fixed on her ways ways, I would focus on establishing as strong a relationship with your daughter as you can. There is no limit as to how strong that relationship can be. Epilepsy is not who you are; it is just another disorder. You could tell your daughter that she can call or talk to you anytime she wants to, especially when she has problems. The relationship with your daughter is separate from the one with your wife. You are a good father and you will always be her father. There is nothing to stop you from having a relationship with your daughter. I don't think epilepsy should be a factor in deciding custody because from the sound of it you are capable of providing for your daughter. Good Luck

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